My letter to the editor of Mothering magazine: Breastfeeding and sexuality

For this post I was VERY inspired after reading an article in the latest issue of Mothering. The article was on the portrayal of breastfeeding in the movies and it included a brief review of about 60 of them. I know what you're thinking: wow, that's quite a topic for quiet, innocent, blushing Janel. What can I say? I am a bit more bold in print than in person I guess. Any thoughts would be appreciated since I haven't sent it in yet. :)

My letter to the editor:

Dear Editor,

I have great admiration for Mothering’s advocacy of breastfeeding as natural, nourishing, and nonsexual. It is a much needed message in a society where people are embarrassed by the sight of a nursing mother and bottles are viewed as the norm. Therefore I was confused and highly disturbed when I read “Reel Milk” in the September/October 2008 edition, specifically the brief review of Crazy Love/Juana la Loca. After taking such a firm stance as a magazine that breastfeeding is not a sexual act, this section seems to applaud the main character experiencing an orgasm from nursing her baby.

I understand that the article reviewed mainly negative portrayals of breastfeeding in filmmaking because positive and neutral portrayals were difficult to come by. I would have assumed this was merely the review of a bizarre and irreverent depiction of breastfeeding in keeping with the rest of the article except for the last two words: Go oxytocin! To my knowledge, the only reason to phrase something that way is to cheer for the person or object in question. Therefore I can only assume that the author was approving of the character experiencing an orgasm, an indisputably sexual act, from breastfeeding her newborn. I believe this is extremely dangerous ground to tread on. It is impossible in my mind to draw a distinction between deriving sexual pleasure from breastfeeding and deriving it from a child in any other way. If it is abusive in any other circumstance than it is equally abusive during a breastfeeding session.

I know your magazine has worked tirelessly to give an accurate view of breastfeeding to a society that is overly obsessed with sex. You have always made it plain that the point of breastfeeding is to provide superior nutrition to our children, to promote bonding between the child and its mother, and to promote emotional and physical health to both. Every issue of Mothering addresses the problem of society sexualizing breastfeeding. In fact, the article “Reel Milk” itself discusses the problem, and this stark contradiction is what caused my confusion upon reading the sentence “Go oxytocin!” later in the article. After so much hard work toward changing our society’s view of breastfeeding, it would be prudent to show more discretion, especially regarding something as inappropriate as orgasms during breastfeeding.

Thank you for your attention!

From one pro-breastfeeding mother to another,

Janel Buckingham